When You Cower You Fall

"It was a hot day in Haiti. Now you’re probably thinking, “Well duh! It’s Haiti!” But what you fail to remember is that I have now been here for three months and my body has adjusted to the temperature so when I say it was hot, believe me that it was hot! There were eight of us traveling to Archaie hospital. Chelsea and I (2 Americans) our translator, the man with the infected hand and that man’s daughter (3 Haitians) and the doctors (3 Germans.) As we entered the hospital, we were met by the Haitian director of the hospital and after much discussion were given a room for the surgery. Before going to the room we were introduced to a Cuban doctor and his assistant. So now our number was bumped up to 10, 2 Americans, 3 Haitians, 2 Cubans and 3 Germans. All of these different cultures and different languages going on in the same room was quite an experience! While they prepared the room Chelsea, myself and the translator  went out on the street to get some lunch. We walked down the street until we found a little “shack” where we got rice and beans with sauce, chicken and plantains. We were ushered into a very small room with a table and a sketchy looking dog. The food was amazing, but the heat was killer and we all exited dripping in sweat. Upon our arrival back at the hospital, they had the man laying out on a table and were preparing him for surgery. Now, as you can imagine, things are very different in Haiti when it comes to medical situations and because we were American and knew the man having surgery, we were allowed to walk in and watch. We entered the room and because I was sick, I put a mask on. They started the surgery and I took a few photos for one of the doctors and then leaned up against the wall and observed. Some would say it was the sight of the blood, others would say it was the heat and dehydration and some would even say it was my sickness, but I went from leaning up against a wall, watching, to lying on the floor right under Chelsea with our translator holding my feet up. Yes, I passed out. I’m fine and did not get any injuries, except to my pride of course. I was told to sit on the floor for the rest of the surgery and I did as I was told. They got all the infection out of the mans hand and we left. On our way out the Cuban doctor looked at me and said “when you cower you fall!”"

    Since that experience I have sat and thought about what that doctor said to me many times. Although it was very much a joke and I still get made fun of for it around the mission, I can’t help but add some seriousness to it. Ask yourself this question, “When I am afraid or upset what is the first thing I want to do?” Now for me the answer is one of two things, I either want to run and hide or run to someone I know who will make me feel safe. Isn’t that what most of us would do? Find safety in a thing or a person? When you cower you fall……why do you fall? Why does your heart drop? Why does your pride sink down? Why do you want to slick back into something other than yourself and make yourself unseen? Well, let’s look at some situations of fear or cowering in the Bible shall we?  

     A few examples we find in the Bible are found in John 6:19-20 where the disciples experience fear as Jesus is walking out on the water towards their boat, Matthew 28:4-6 when both Mary’s encounter an angel at Jesus’ grave proclaiming He had risen and Acts 18:9-10  where Paul is discouraged and wants to run to the Gentiles to preach the good news. In each:9-10 of these examples, and many more in the Bible, there is one phrase in common. “Do not be afraid!”  

So yes, when we cower, when we are weak, when we are afraid beyond measure we fall. But, there is always that voice saying “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10 

      

     So the next time you’re in an operating room and pass out, or the dark is scary, or you are unsure of the future and what lies ahead, remember that God is with you. You cannot hide from Him only in Him. He is your shelter and protection from the evil one and although what that Cuban doctor said in his broken English was true, I know who holds my fear and who can make it disappear. Funny how things can give you such a broader look on certain aspects of faith. Had I not passed out that day at the hospital an had that doctor not said anything to me as a joke I would have never sat and thought about what we can learn from fear and our reaction to it. I hope you’ve learned from my personal observations! God Bless!